The morning drop off guilt is real and it's okay!

As we start a new term, I want to talk about something that nobody really warns you about before your child starts preschool.

The guilt.

Not just on the first day. Every day. You hand them over, you walk to the car, and somewhere between the car park and the main road you wonder if you're doing the right thing. You replay their face. You check your phone more than you need to. You feel like maybe a better parent would have found a way to stay home.

I've worked in childcare in Brentwood for years and I can tell you honestly that the parents who feel this the most are almost always the ones whose children are thriving the most. The fact that you care enough to feel guilty is the same thing that makes you a brilliant parent.

Here's what I've seen with my own eyes, hundreds of times over. A child cries at the gate. The parent leaves, heartbroken. Within four minutes that child is on the floor building something with the train set, completely absorbed, laughing at something one of the other kids has done. By the time you're stuck in traffic on the A12 your child has already forgotten they were upset.

That doesn't mean their feelings weren't real. It means they felt safe enough to move on.

At Faces we never rush a goodbye. If your child needs five minutes, they get five minutes. If they need a staff member to sit with them while they settle, that's what happens. We've had children who cried every morning for three weeks and then one day just stopped, walked in, hung their coat up and never looked back. Every child gets there in their own time.

The thing I always say to parents is this. Your child crying at drop-off is not a sign that something is wrong. It's a sign that they love you. And the fact that they stop crying the moment you're gone is not a sign that they don't need you. It's a sign that they trust the people they're with.

If you're dreading drop off on Monday morning, I get it. Feel the guilt, feel the worry, and know that on the other side of that gate your child is in good hands. Come and see for yourself if you're not sure. We're always happy to show you around.

Sam Wheeler Faces Kids Club & Preschool, Brentwood